Kevin Bemel ·
How to Tame Anxiety
2014 and 2013 could not have begun more differently.
A year ago: I was suffering from the worst back pain I had ever experienced exacerbated by a terrible reaction to pain medication. A spine specialist told me even after recovering from the pain and medication it would be months before I could run and I ought to start thinking about another form of exercise.
I had no income because my civilian business plans had fallen apart when the university I had partnered with backed out leaving me with no financial backing.
Everywhere I turned anxiety greeted me.
Contrast
Today: No back pain, I am running almost 25 miles a week. I got through the nasty respiratory ailment plaguing my family with no medication. This week I launch a new venture that is more exciting than what I had planned to do with the university.
Still, everywhere I turn anxiety greets me.
Change
Why did life seem so lousy a year ago and so good now? I made one simple change that completely altered my perspective.
Last January I made of list of the things that caused anxiety in my life, separated into two categories:
- Potentially Less Than a Year to Resolution
- Most Likely Long-Term or Never Ending
Two things stood out about my list when it was finished:
- Though I spent a lot of time thinking and making notes about the things causing me stress, the list was surprisingly short.
- Merely writing down the things I worry about took most of their power away. I resolved to review the list when I did my weekly planning but after a month or two, though none had been resolved, they no longer felt like a burden.
Earlier this month I think I found out what happened. According to health psychologist Kelly McGonigal, people who experienced a lot of stress but did not think it was harmful had a lower risk of dying than those who experienced little stress in their lives. Put another way, if you believe stress will kill you your chances of dying are 43% higher. (Read the article here.)
[Tweet "What you believe about the harmfulness of stress is more important than whether you experience stress"]
Quantifying my anxiety by writing it down prompted me to see it was not nearly so engulfing as I imagined and helped me to shift my belief about stress.
Now I know that being well rested is the determinant of whether I will deal with stress well. Seven hours of sleep a night with some extra rest on the Sabbath and I am good to go. Several nights with six hours or less sleep and I am hard pressed to deal with my burdens.
For 2014, do the following:
- Make a list of your anxieties. Are they as onerous as you thought?
- Compare them to your goals. Will accomplishing your objectives reduce your burdens?
- Finally, assess your attitude toward stress. Read Ms. McGonigal’s article. Must you believe that stress will harm you?
If you are starting this year the way I started 2013, I pray that 2014 will bring you the kind of transformation last year brought me. If you hit the ground running on January 1, make a quick assessment of your beliefs about stress: No point letting some latent attitude ambush your road to success.
Am I crazy to think stress cannot harm me? Please comment yes or no, more if you care to elaborate.
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