Are You Making the Mistake of Being Occupied Instead of Engaged?

“Anything worth doing is worth doing right.” – Hunter S. Thompson

Do you feel productive during your day? Are you getting a lot done? Do you remember what you did? Was it worth doing? Your life satisfaction hangs on how you answer these questions.

My father had a pithy saying for when I did a poor job at something. I always felt crushed when he would say it to me because it meant he was disappointed by my lack of effort and knew I could do much better if I put my mind to it. I did not realize it until recently but he was teaching me a very important but subtle distinction:

Occupied is Not the Same as Engaged

At the grocery store one day with my mother I saw an offer from Green Giant frozen vegetables to get a Green Giant action figure. (Okay, back then they were called dolls, sheesh!) I wanted one badly. One problem: my mother did not buy Green Giant products because others were less expensive. What was a boy to do?

I got out my paper and Crayons and made the labels of Green Giant products and coins necessary to get the doll. I spelled corn “cron.” My mother loved my work so much she sent them to Green Giant. Several weeks later I received a letter letting me know that they could not send me a doll but would I like the enclosed kite instead? Wow, a cool, big kite in exchange for some drawings! Because of my desire for the doll, I was deeply engaged in my work. Needless to say, my dad did not use his pithy phrase to describe my Green Giant work.

As difficult as it sounds, the real challenge you face each day is to be engaged with your family, work, G-d, and whatever tasks you have set for yourself. You will not create much that is worthwhile if you are merely occupied. I am convinced that this level of engagement has largely solved my insomnia. At bedtime my mind is so tired from having been consistently engaged it craves sleep.

Certainly, there are times for setting your mind on neutral. When you exercise and sleep.

At other times, do not mistake being busily occupied with being engaged. Admittedly it takes a lot of energy to stay so conscious all of the time. Like physical fitness, you need to build up your brain to increase mental energy.

Start by being more deeply engaged in one daily activity, preferably one that requires you to interact with someone else since that will help keep you focused. You will find that your dealings go more smoothly, communication will be healthier, and your enjoyment will increase. Once you find that you can stay engaged with this task, take on a second.

Will you ever get to the point that you are engaged all day long? Unlikely. But the goal is incremental, lifelong improvement. And you will have taken another step toward #LivingIntentionally.

How do you stay engaged when you have to do a routine or boring task?
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