0:00 [Music] Who are you? And where are you going? What do you [Music] want? Hello and welcome to People Making Money. I'm your host, Kevin Bemel, and we're here every Wednesday at 10:00 a.m. Pacific time to talk about job hunting, building a business, uh obtaining uh wealth or building wealth, uh all the financial aspects of
0:38 our lives. Uh and um we you know this is the broadest based show that I do. Um we talk about everything from um success motivation to relationships to the nuts and bolts of creating an entity uh for you know for running a business pretty much pretty much everything in in in that realm. And so today I'm going to be focusing on the the more of kind of the mindset um that it takes for uh for financial
1:13 success. Uh, and um, as I've been promoting the show this week, uh, I've been mentioning that, uh, I'm a Trojan. I went to University of Southern California. Uh, you know, fight on, as we say. But my, uh, my my source for today's show is Coach John Wooden, the uh, absolutely legendary basketball coach at the University of California, Los Angeles. Um, and of course USC and UCLA are are arch rivals. Uh, cross arch cross town
1:49 rivals. Um, but uh, you know, I I I I come by my um my respect for uh, Coach Wooden honestly. I think um, f first of all, I I I I admire uh his his accomplishments tremendously. Second of all, um going back now about gosh, I think close to 40 years, uh I had the opportunity to hear him speak in person. Uh he spoke extemporaneously as I recall and it was absolutely inspiring uh to to
2:24 to hear him do that. Um and as well, one of my longest standing and closest friends, a man I'd call my brother, even though we have different mothers, as they say. Uh I guess it's like uh what was that album? Twin Sons of Different Mothers. Um my friend uh Dell uh although um Dell got his PhD from USC, he was a professor at UCLA for uh several decades. So uh there are connections there. Um but but in any event and and and perhaps it is a tribute of just how great an individual
3:00 Coach Wooden was that someone from his arch rival school right wants wants to talk about u what you know his legacy and and and his ideas. So um this this this my my my sort of source book is this wonderful it's it's a little book. It's I just not even 200 pages long as I recall. Uh 190 Oh, no. 201 pages. There you go. So, it's a 201 page book, but you can get through it in a single reading easily. It's called Wooden, a lifetime of observations and
3:37 reflections on and off the court. And it's it it's ostensibly written by John Wooden, but um it's it's it's with Steve Jameson, who, you know, probably was was the guy who, you know, actually sort of wrote it down um by by talking to to Coach Wooden, uh which which is a you know, you know, a respectful way of of documenting your legacy. Um and and so the I'm going to talk about a few of of Coach Wooden's ideas, but really there is
4:12 absolutely no um uh um substitution for reading this book. It is inspiring. Um it is just it it so well, I think, encompasses everything that Coach Wooden is about. Um, and this this this picture on the back here, this is Coach Wooden, I think, uh, you know, as a young man there. I think that's his wife, if I'm not mistaken. Here he is, you know, uh, toward the end of his career. And, um, here's uh, one of his one of his
4:50 favorite sayings is right here. It says, "I pray thee, oh God, that I may be beautiful within." Uh what I mean what a tremendous sentiment um from from a man who spent his you know professional life in the you know rough and tumble world of sports of college athletics. Um and I think it it speaks very very well of of Coach Wooden that he would um put something like that um you know on the back cover of his book. So, um, if you were to flip through the, um,
5:27 um, uh, table of contents, you'll see there's just dozens and dozens of they're all very short. Um, each one is is maybe about a page long, many of them shorter than a page. Um, just thoughts that he gives on um, you you could say their their thoughts on success. I would argue that their thoughts on how to be not just a decent human being but a fine human being. And and I would go further with this in saying that if we want to be successful in business, I think the
6:03 first thing we have to do is strive to be a decent human being. Um I know there are many people out there who see business as a cutthroat endeavor. um if if I lose that meant somebody else wins. Um and so I I can't have that. I've got to win um at the expense of somebody else. And uh I I don't have that perspective on business. U my perspective is that the best business relationships are those where we're we're working for mutual benefit. Uh
6:40 sometimes one of us may get a little bit more benefit than the other, but then maybe next time the other person is going to benefit a little bit more. But indeed the the the the the business transactions that actually close, if you will, that that go through are those where both sides see that they have a significant benefit in in making in in having the transaction come together and having the deal come together. Um, and if one side doesn't see that, it's unlikely that it will. I can tell you that in my practice as an independent
7:15 trustee and probate administrator, one of the challenges is often it's a situation where one uh party, if you will, to the action sees andor it is actually the case that they're not going to benefit at all. And so they have no reason to cooperate and as a result they just keep you know lobbing grenades metaphorically into the process because why not? And and unfortunately you can
7:50 find lawyers who will help facilitate this and all it does is drag out the pro the process. It raises the costs. It causes a tremendous amount of bad feeling uh to to no one's benefit. Even the person who's delay causing the delays, they're not benefiting by it. all they're doing is causing trouble and and it's in the end it's it's very childish because to harm other people uh you know essentially for no reason to harm other people because you're upset that um you know you you are not part of
8:26 the inheritance or um because of of how somebody put together their will or failed to put together their will um you're you're excluded. um that that is oftentimes if not most of the time has nothing to do with the with the people who are poised to benefit. Um that rests with the deedent and the deedent is gone now. And so to hold other people responsible for um maybe irresponsibility on the part of the deedent or it may not even be
9:02 irresponsibility. It must just it may just have been they they couldn't um deal with the process of proper estate planning. It's it's it's very difficult um facing one's own uh demise is not an easy thing to do emotionally and and and so to you know sort of wreak vengeance on those people who are benefiting uh financially anyway from from someone dying. um when they very likely had nothing to do with, you know, you're being left out um is is is is
9:39 immature if if not, you know, actually childish. Having said that, I'm dealing with, you know, a couple of cases like that right now where, you know, anything the person can do to, you know, throw a wrench into the works, um because they're not going to get anything, they're they're they're doing it. So, I think that's the that's certainly the antithesis of of my uh business philosophy and it's it's absolutely the antithesis of of coach Wooden's philosophy. So I I I I think that um if if you look at some of his uh
10:17 top players including for example Kareem Abdul Jabbar um who was not just an outstanding basketball player he was an outstanding man um and uh um I you know I'm not a huge basketball fan um but uh uh you know I I I admire their uh athleticism since I don't have I don't have very much of it. Um but my fondest rec my fondest uh thought of of Kareem
10:52 Abdul Jabar is actually in the movie Airplane where uh he plays the co-pilot and he's in the cockpit with the pilot and the navigator and a little boy you know comes up to visit the cockpit. That was you know a very popular thing to do. I know when I was five or six years old, I I flew on an airplane from Phoenix to uh Kansas to Kansas City, Missouri, and and I I got to go, you know, visit the cockpit. I was absolutely over, right? And uh the the the boy who's up there visiting, he turns to the co-pilot, he says, "I know
11:28 you're you're Kareem Abdul Jabbar." And he's and and and and then it is it indeed it is um Abdul Jabar, but he's of course playing the co-pilot. Uh Roger, I think is his name. And he says, "No, I you you're making a mistake. I'm the co-pilot, you know, Roger such and such." And um and finally the boy says, "You know, I think you're great, but my father says, you know, you're lazy and you just mail it in kind of thing." And and you know, of course, at that point, Abdul Jabbar breaks character and he grabs the boy by the front of his shirt and he says, you know, you know, you try
12:03 lapping Lenir or whoever the players he mentions on the court for 60 minutes and see how you, you know, stand up. But I mean, it's such a perfect moment of uh, you know, he's like trying to be all calm and, you know, be the, you know, stay in his character and then he breaks character. It's just it's I it's one of the great uh movie moments. Um but but that he would you know allow himself to be you know put in this position of of this little kid sort of putting him down you know on behalf of his father. It shows a certain uh humility um that uh
12:39 that I think Kareem Abdul Jabbar had. And and I I I I would venture to say although I don't know this for a fact, this is something he he learned from uh coach Wooden uh and and there are there are many players who I think attribute their maturity into manhood to coach uh Wooden's teaching. And so, um, I I never got to actually speak with with John Wooden, but I would love to ask him the question, um, were you building great basketball players or were you building great men? And I have a feeling that he
13:17 would say he was building great men who were also extremely capable uh, basketball players. And uh again, I think that speaks very well of of him of of Coach Wooden. So in business too, um to go back to my original theme, I think we want to be um fine human beings and and not allow ourselves to be dragged into the gutter regions of business. Um and and in that way build a a loyal um
13:52 and respectful uh clientele and and uh you know when we make mistakes um you know admit them and fix them that kind of thing and approach u business with with some humility and and so that's why I think it's important from time to time to talk about ideas from uh various sources like these uh lifetime observations of of uh Coach Wooden. So, I just have a few here that I want to share with you. This is going to be I think the show is going to be a little
14:28 bit on the shorter side. Um and and and and that's okay. So, um Coach Wooden talks about the pyramid of success and he lays out the character traits and behavior that are essential for achievement. And of course he's he talks um primarily uh from a a a non-b businessiness standpoint, from a life standpoint, if you will. But I think that that these uh these traits that he identifies are um absolutely crucial to
15:06 success in business today and some of them maybe even more so um because of how business has changed. So among the qualities that he mentions are industriousness or hard work, uh enthusiasm, loyalty and team spirit. So uh I'm just want to talk for a couple minutes about each one. So uh clearly industriousness is the foundational element to business success. um if if you're not going to get out and
15:42 work hard, you're you're not going to be successful in business or or a profession. That that's just the bottom line. Um and and you know, I we I had a meeting yesterday um with some colleagues and we were talking about some of the things happening in the real estate business these days. So, there's been some pretty significant changes in the way um u uh real estate commissions work and um how real estate agents get compensated. And one of those is that historically agents working with the
16:19 buyer of a property uh didn't really have to worry about uh how they were getting paid because the seller paid the seller of a property paid a commission and it was split between the agent representing the seller and the agent representing the buyer. And so buyer agents didn't have to deal with that. and and under the new system, this uh this sharing of commissions uh is is not uh is is it it can't be the common thing um that it that it used to be. And so buyer agents have to be
16:56 proactive in figuring out how they're going to get paid. And there's different ways that can happen. They can be paid by their client. They can be paid directly by the seller. these sort of things. So, but but the reality is they've got buyer PE people agents working with buyers have to do their homework in figuring out how all this is going to work. They have to read the new forms that have been developed to deal with the new situation and uh a a lot of them just haven't done the work. So, we were talking about a situation where
17:33 uh a a buyer's agent was interested in a property being marketed by uh by my colleague and he basically said to him, "Well, uh you know, just however you want to get compensated, make that part of an an offer on the property and the seller will consider that." So then, so instead of doing that, he called someone else and asked the same question. And and she was smart enough to say, "Well, you have to call essentially the first guy you spoke to, right?" And and the
18:09 conversation that ensued really came down to he just didn't want to do the work, right? And that's that's a problem. Um, so that's why I and and this is just one small example, but this is why industriousness is so important. So, we were sitting in a in a coffee shop um in the downtown LA arts district. I'm going to give them a plug because they're so fantastic. It's called Verve. So, if you have not been to Verve, there's I think three or four of them in the LA area. That is the place to get coffee as far as I'm concerned. One of the reasons why I say
18:44 this is because the people who work at Verve are industrious. So um you know they are they are clearly there to work and and and provide uh you know coffee and and service to the customers. You don't you really don't have to ask for anything. So my my colleague was he had he was pouring out some additional coffee and he spilled some and right away one of the people was there with some napkins to help him, you know, wipe it up and and it's like,
19:19 wow, who does that today anymore, right? It just the people who are working there, they're there to work, right? And and this is what we need in business. We need uh employees, we need colleagues who want to work. Um, and uh, you know, after after our meeting was done, I I I went and spoke to um, the the sort of, you know, young fellow who I thought was the manager. It turned out he was just somebody who worked there, which is that that by itself is impressive, right? He's just a guy who's working there, but he he carries himself like like a manager, like someone who's really
19:54 responsible for the success of of of the business. And I said, I just want to thank you that, you know, your atmosphere is great. the service here is is unc incomparable. I said, I I just I wanted to thank you. I said, you're you're the manager, right? And he says, no, I just work here. I said, oh, well, for what it's worth, you know, please pass on what I said, you know, to your manager because, you know, he's got a fantastic crew here and it's really a pleasure to to come here. And he was very grateful, you know, that I took the time to to say that. Um we had a nice
20:29 little conversation for a few minutes. Um but you know the industriousness that he exhibited um like I said it's just it's not common in in business anymore. Um I won't bore you with more examples but it's it's it's one of the you know daily challenges I have in my profession is a lot of the the people with whom I have to deal they just really don't want to do the work and so they're not going to be successful. So, next is enthusiasm. And I'm going to continue on the ver I'm going to I'm going to get you to go to Verb Coffee. I guess that'll be my goal
21:04 for today, right? Um, but the people there are also very enthusiastic. Um, first of all, they have a really outstanding product. The coffee is delicious. There's no other way to describe it. Um, and I think they know they have a great product. They're they've got a better product than I think any coffee shop I've been to. Um and and and they're enthusiastic about it. They're not, you know, doing back handsprings in the aisles or anything, but but there's sort of you can you there's a a feeling you get that there's a pride when they serve you, you know, the
21:42 coffee when they bring it to the table. Uh and again that that that kind of enthusiastic pride that that sort of calm pride that I I I think is enthusiasm. Um it it makes a difference and it makes it a pleasure to be there uh you know to to you know have a cup of coffee or in my case a cup of espresso right? So, so again I in a business we want to help our people uh our teammates whatever your colleagues develop a certain enthusiasm for our
22:18 business or for our the our practice. Um because that that means that that they're really engaged with what they're doing, right? And it's it's not an easy thing to do. It it may be the hardest thing to do. uh and and and it it takes a lot of care on the part uh a lot of attention and a lot of care on the part of the leadership of a business. And so uh you know we we need to pay attention to that. I think that's you know helping his players build enthusiasm I suspect
22:53 was uh one of you know uh John Wooden's geniuses right and it's it's something that I try and emulate in in my business relationships. So, so and and again I I I think we need to be careful. Enthusiasm often comes off as like rah rah sisboom. I mean there there are times maybe when that's appropriate, but I the way I read enthusiasm is is a sense of real pride in what we're doing that that we con convey through our actions, through how we talk about things. Okay. Next is is
23:31 loyalty. And you know, loyalty seems like a a um a bygone trait today. Sadly, uh I I I I will tell you candidly, I struggle with the lack of loyalty in in American society today. Um now, uh loyalty doesn't mean uh feelalty. Those are not the same thing. So loyalty means um committing to being a part of something in a productive
24:08 way, right? That's true loyalty. And again, this is something that leadership needs to work to develop among, you know, team members, colleagues, employees, however, however we describe them. and and it it it's it's something that's built. I I don't think especially these days we can take loyalty for granted. Um maybe there was a time, I don't know, half a century or more ago when when it was expected that if someone was part of an organization,
24:44 they would be loyal to it. Today, we can't expect that. And I think part of the reason we can't expect that is organizations are no longer uh uh you know unreservedly loyal uh to the people who work for them. So you know we went we went we periodically go through periods of of of massive layoffs. Um now you know uh they're necessary in in in a lot of cases. Um but but you know they they event sort of lack of loyalty to employees right and
25:19 so um it it shouldn't be any surprise to us that uh you know people who have been laid off from a business feel that in some ways the business has been disloyal to them. I I I think that's that's largely the case right now. hopefully, you know, the company will help them in the in the transition to, you know, their next situation or whatever and and express some loyalty even as they um insist that that that people have to leave. Uh but but loyalty can't be taken for granted. And so I think we have to be careful too as we work to develop
25:55 loyalty that we explain that there are uh there are qualities that we're looking for uh in the people to whom the organization is going to be loyal. So if if if people are are not giving uh their industriousness and their enthusiasm to the organization then maybe it's it's correct to not uh exhibit loyalty toward those individuals nor to expect them to exhibit loyalty toward the organization.
26:30 Right? So, so these are the factors that have to balance themselves out. And this is why I think as we hire people and bring them into our organizations, we need to be very mindful of, you know, what traits are we looking for in our team members and what expectations are we setting and how do we handle a situation where someone has not met those expectations, right? um probably not the right thing to just you know fire them at the first mistake. Um probably you
27:08 know need some an opportunity to you know for some some additional training and working with them and then also explaining to them that look here's here's the level at which we're expecting you to operate. We're willing to work with you to get up to that level, but we do need to get you up to that level. And and candidly, if if you're not able to rise up to that level, then perhaps this isn't the right organization for you, and you know, you'll have to find um you know, somewhere else to work. Okay? So, we want to develop loyalty, but we also want to do so in a way that uh um it's
27:44 mutual and it's beneficial. Um it it's not one yeah it's mutual um and so that um you know those to whom we're giving loyalty as an organization um are are loyal back to us and vice versa right and then finally uh team spirit. So if we want to build a strong company, I think there has to be a team spirit and and what that means is we all pitch in as necessary uh to, you know, get done what needs to be done. We all listen to each other. We all take on board ideas.
28:22 we're all willing to hear uh criticism, if you will, or constructive input um from other people. Uh whether they're junior, whether they're senior, shouldn't necessarily matter. Now, of course, we want these kinds of dialogues to be respectful. We don't want a junior person uh you know, cursing out the you know, president of the organization. But by the way, we don't want the president of the organization cursing out the junior person either, right? And so if we're really going to have team spirit, it really means we need to work together uh and and and and build together. And
29:00 that means really creating a lot of uh you know cross um cross conversations so that um people feel they are part of a team. Okay. So, so those are uh those those are some some of the the basics of of John Wooden's pyramid of success. Okay. And so that's number one. Number two, um focus on process, not just outcomes. So,
29:35 um um John Wooden believed in being the best that you can be rather than fixating on winning. And I and and by the way he it's it's being the best that you can be doesn't mean being perfect. So uh I I think um John Wooden would agree that the pursuit of perfection is is is counterproductive. The he you know he emphasized quality innovation and continuous improvement. The problem with
30:11 pursuing perfection is we're never going to reach it. And the desire to and and and so the desire to be perfect is as likely to cause us to not improve as it is to improve. Now, I've I've had this discussion with many many people and and some who, you know, virantly disagree with me on this. Um to a certain extent I find these arguments to be somewhat semantical. But the reality is if we make as our objective something so
30:47 lofty and we create a situation where we're so afraid of the consequences of not making that lofty goal. We're creating situation where we're unlikely to try. Okay. And I I I see this a lot among young people especially. So what we want to do is is to create an environment where it's understood that as we strive to be the best that we can be, we know sometimes we're going to
31:22 fall short. And so then the emphasis is on okay, what went wrong? How do we correct it? How can we do better next time? That's the feedback loop of which we want to be a part. Now, obviously in in in sports, so you know, we're we're training, we're drilling, we're practicing, that's all a part of that, okay? And we're all doing that in, you know, in order to win the game, right? So, business doesn't seem to work that way, right? Because in business, the the
31:59 game is sort of always going on, right? Nonetheless, it actually is the same process. So whether we're in sales where today we're looking to uh you know sell to a prospect and tomorrow we're going to do so and the next day and the next day and the next day. So yes, we're always in the game, but the reality is that what we should be striving to do with each encounter is improve, right? knowing that we're not going to close every sale. Okay, that's people who who
32:34 have to close every sale almost never become good salespeople because they're so afraid of not closing a sale that they don't take the risks that are necessary to become a top salesperson. Okay. So we want to we want to emphasize quality having quality skills building our knowledge that making sure that knowledge is solid. It's not just a bunch of you know fluff. Okay. We want to emphasize innovation. How can we do things better more efficiently? Um how
33:10 can we uh connect better with with with with people etc. And how do we continually improve so that continuously improve I should say so that uh we're not sitting on our laurels. That's the culture we want to create in our businesses with our people. And that means we've got to give them the leeway to make mistakes and sometimes to fail and not come down on them like a you know ton of bricks for having done so. But approach it from the standpoint of
33:45 okay, so that didn't work. What do you think went wrong? Right? How could how could you do this differently in the future so as to raise uh the the likelihood of success or as so as to make it more likely that you'll be successful the next time, right? That's really what's important. And that gives and and and by the way that goes back then to you know the the previous things we were talking about loyalty, teamwork, enthusiasm, team spirit. Okay. So all of
34:20 these all of these as all of these traits and aspects work together. Okay. So we want to fos we want to work on process. We want to focus on process not just outcomes. Now, of course, we need a certain level of, you know, sales to close, for example, in order for the business to uh exist, if not thrive. Of course, we do. But what's going to make the business successful and what it's going to improve outcomes is going to be focusing on a process of continually continually improve continuously improving. Um, that's that's what's going to drive it. Okay. Number three,
34:56 make each day your masterpiece. I I will uh you know I will cop to uh you know struggling with this at times right. So this idea is is that uh consistent um uh effort and excellence in our in you know in our daily work is is really what's going to lead to success, right? So, so this is this is kind of like, you know, being the best that you can be, but um you know, the the the road to
35:33 success is is paved with a lot of kind of just grinding it out, if you will. Right now, it's easier to see this in sports, right? Uh if if you're going to be a great basketball player, you probably are going to dribble the ball like, you know, I don't know, a thousand times a day. You're going to take hundreds of free throw shots and and hundreds of shots on goal um over over a week or or maybe even just a few days, right? It's it's the it's the practice
36:08 the continual pra continuous practice that is going to uh that's going to drive success and that and and it's it's actually better to so let me switch the metaphor for a moment here. Let's say you want to be successful in playing a musical instrument. You'll be better off practicing an hour a day, like six days a week, than you would be practicing six hours a day, one day a week. You'll make much more improvement practicing an hour
36:44 a day, six hours, six days a week. That's just the that's just the way, you know, building things are because you practice six hours a day, but then you don't practice again for another seven days. So you you you your um muscle memory for example atrophies. I know this from having learned to play the ukulele, right? Uh and so the same thing is true in anything in which we're involved. So if we're you know uh in accounting, if we're again if we're in sales, if we're
37:20 in management, right? It's it's the daily engagement in our activities and working to make each one of them excellent or at least better than they were the day before. That's going to drive the success in a business. Okay. So if if we're in sales and we do presentations to customers, so what really matters is each day consistently working to making
37:56 that presentation a little bit better. Okay? And and and that that that that consistency on a day-by-day basis will eventually create kind of a system of sustained success. So that's that's really what we want to do. Okay. And and you know again make each day your masterpiece really is saying that each day you know we have an opportunity to paint the canvas of what that day is going to be all about. Okay. So we can either do that or not. And and if we're only looking to do that once a week and
38:33 the and the other five or six days a week we mail it in, we're probably not going to be successful either as people or as uh you know businessmen. Okay. Next, control the controllables. So, uh Coach Wooden emphasized preparation, effort, and attitude. um because those are things that we can control rather than worrying about things that are outside our control like what the other team is doing. We have no control in that. I was having a conversation with someone earlier today on this very
39:09 subject. Um, and I was mentioning to him that uh one of the biggest frustrations of of of my practice is I deal with uh a you know a lot of uh lawyers that are basically you know in opposition to uh to my my clients or they're in opposition to my administration of of a probate and I have no control over what they do. Um some of them are extraordinarily nasty. they they love launching ad homonym attacks and and and
39:44 it's it's it's after a while it gets it gets pretty aggravating, right? Um when you know their case against something that I'm doing is that you know I'm I'm a scoundrel essentially, right? Um but but I I just I unfortunately I don't have not unfortunately it's just reality is I don't have any control over what they say. I have no control over their ethics. I have no control over them at all. They're going to do what they're going to do. And my job is to as much as possible ignore them or at least ignore their
40:19 behavior and focus on making sure I'm as well prepared as possible. Focus on delivering the best effort that I can make and focus on keeping my attitude where it needs to be. And and I can tell you it's it's it's a challenge. sometimes because I'll be in court and you know some lawyer will be saying absolutely nasty untrue things and the temptation is to say your honor tell this clown to shut up right um but that's not going to help the situation in fact it's going to make the situation
40:55 worse so I have to adjust my attitude and and remind myself that I don't have any control over uh what this you know person is saying and I also have no control over whether the judge believes it or not. So, it's tempting for me to think, oh, because the person is saying this and the judge is not telling him to shut up that the judge believes it. But, but I don't know that that's the case. Okay? Or I don't always know that that's the case. Right? So um you know and and and so we need to focus or we need to uh
41:33 keep in mind that you know we we should work on controlling the controllables and those are the preparation that we do. They're the effort that we put in. They're the attitude that we bring to our business. Right? Those are the things that will help us be successful and the rest um we have to let go of. So by focusing on preparation, effort and attitude, what we're really doing is we're focusing on execution, on adaptability, on resilience. All of these are things that we can work on,
42:08 things that we can build, especially adaptability and resilience. Now I'll be the first one to acknowledge there are times when our resilience fails in you know in in in life in business right and if it does okay so then we need to regroup we may need we may need to rest and and and and sort of re regain our equinimity regain our perspective and then move on from there. Okay. And look we're not we're not perfect. This is where striving for perfection
42:44 uh can can can also be very negative if if we if we mess up in our adaptability and resilience. Okay. Right. We got to give ourselves a little bit of grace uh and okay figure out how do I do it better next time and and then move on. And remember just focus on controlling the controllables and let the other stuff fall by the way. Okay. Next number five, little things make big things happen. So very small improvements can have a big impact on
43:21 our business. I experienced this uh myself earlier this year. So uh again I was talking to somebody about this earlier uh today. I was feeling for the last up until about a month or two ago and and for the last year I was feeling essentially overwhelmed by everything that I had to do. And I realized that it mostly came from the fact of how I was keeping track of what I had to do. So I was grouping tasks uh um by you know the
43:58 person to whom I was responsible and oftentimes if and and so since I was working by per the person uh I would never check that task off my list right and I realized wait that's the wrong way to do it uh because I know going in I'm not going to get all those tasks done because oftentimes I had to get one done before I could even do the next one that sort of thing. So what I started doing was focusing on the individual tasks that need to be that needed to be accomplished uh for a particular person and and but the dividing them up. Okay.
44:36 So, I didn't have a list of, you know, eight things that I that I that, you know, it looked like I was responsible for getting done today and then maybe I would get half of of one of them done and so tomorrow I still have the same list of eight things. No, I broke them down so I have eight tasks now instead of one task with eight parts. and and just a small change like that helped me realize I was actually accomplishing a lot and in any given day I actually had a pretty reasonable amount of work to
45:12 do. Okay? And it's even made me be able to get through tasks more quickly because I'm not sitting there staring at the long list saying, "How am I going to get this done?" Right? So just a a small tweak has allowed me to be much more productive in my in my practice in my professional life, right? And oftentimes that that is that is how these things work. So we we overlook I it should have been obvious I think to me that that I was you know
45:48 handling the the my task completion in a in a counterproductive way. Right? So oftentimes it'll be some little thing that we're just not seeing and and and that that can be holding us back and and so you know we need to take time to sit back and uh examine why am I not uh as productive as I need to be or why am I feeling stressed out? Uh you know is it really justified? And one of the tasks, one of the one of the um uh not tasks,
46:27 one of the processes I use is when I'm feeling particularly stressed out, whether it's about work, which is often the case, or something else, is I sit down and and and write out what's going on. And oftentimes I I I feel that it's once I've written it down, I realize it's not as overwhelming as I as it feels like up here in my head. So the the process is to get it out of our heads down onto paper. Once it's down on paper, we can start breaking it up and
47:05 and well, first of all, we can look at what that I put on paper is real and what's not real. And then for the stuff that's actually real, we can start breaking that down to deal with it. For the stuff that's not real, we can work on reminding ourselves this this actually doesn't have any bearing on my life. It's it's something I've conjured up in my head, but it it really has no impact. Okay. So, um, the way to find little things that can make big things happen, I think, is is to
47:40 start putting things down on paper. And it may seem like, well, why do I want to take the time to do that? The process of writing them down is what helps us gain clarity. Okay? So, uh, if we're if we're stuck in something in business or in our business or professional lives, start writing it down. Okay? And then if you have a trusted friend or a mentor, talk to them about it. Show them what you've written down and and and get their input about it. Okay? And that will oftentimes help us make what is probably only needs to be a small a small change, a tiny
48:16 breakthrough that will then yield tremendous results. Okay. And then finally, uh number six, uh be true to yourself. So, so, uh, Coach Wooden preached integrity and authenticity. Now, I I I think this is very important. Um, but I also think it's oftentimes highly misunderstood. So, I I've been in situations where people uh say, you know, very nasty things, uh very impolitic things,
48:53 impolite things, and if I'm in a situation where I can, you know, sort of call them on it, they'll say, "Look, I'm just I'm just being in me, right?" Say, "Okay, well, that's fine." And again, this happened just this morning. I had this happen. and they say, "Well, this this is this is who I am. This is how I deal with these things." And I said I said, "That's fine." I said, "But you're not reaching me by being that way." Right? So, I think we, you know, there's we we need to be careful when we when we talk about
49:28 integrity and authenticity. So integrity meanings means staying true to our values and hopefully we have good values and so they are worth staying true to. Okay. The way we express that integrity though can take many different forms. So we can say to someone uh look uh this is a situation that I I find I am at odds with and I cannot be involved with this
50:04 situation any longer and so I I need to bow out. Okay, now that's done. That's, you know, we we've maintained our integrity and and and hopefully have done so in a way that doesn't that says to the other person that that expresses some some uh you know that that is it decently treats the other person. That's what I want to say. Decently treats the other person. Okay. We can also say, look, you're turning me into an effing liar. I won't stand for that. F you. Get out of my
50:39 face. Okay. Now, I suppose we're acting with integrity there, too, because we're expressing that we're not going to be put in a position that's in in conflict with our values. Uh, but we're not doing it in a particularly decent way. Now, this is where the issue of authenticity comes in. For some people, it will feel inauthentic to express their desire to act in an integral way uh in a way that also treats the other person decently. Okay? And and and that may be
51:16 a problem, but it's only a problem if part of their values are I don't care how I treat people. Okay? Now, by the way, if your value is I care about how I'm treated, but I don't care about how other people are treated, you have conflicting values. That's just the bottom line. So, if you care about how you're treated, then you have to care about how you treat other people. Okay? If you abuse other people, then you can't expect them to
51:53 turn around and treat you decently. Okay, minimum the best you can expect is they walk away from you and ignore you. Okay. So this is where and and this is where I think the the concept of authenticity is sometimes misapprehended because while you know the truly authentic you know our truly authentic nature may want us to just you know pound somebody. Okay.
52:28 If our authenticity is at odds with our values, our values should govern. Okay? And and look, I I I said this to the person I was talking to this morning. I said, you know, I value calm relationships where people treat each other decently. That's what I value. and and and if that's you know not something that you value that's fine I
53:03 said but then I think it would be very difficult for us to to work together and that's fine I'm not saying somebody has to adopt my values all I'm saying is if you don't have my values okay which include the necessity to treat people decently in part because I want to be treat treated decently so then it's it's you this is probably not a relationship that's going to work out. Okay? And I don't accept as an excuse, well, I'm just being authentic to myself. Oh, that's fine. Okay. Fine. Go
53:38 be authentic somewhere else. Okay? Because authenticity is not an excuse in in in my values. Authenticity is not an excuse for indecent treatment. Okay? And so and and and and I I think we we we use these terms somewhat inaccurately. We sometimes use them as excuses. And and I I I'm I'm sure I've done it in the past. I I hope when I have I've I've been willing to hear it if someone called me on it or I've been willing to reflect on my
54:14 behavior and and apologize for it. Um I'm I'm sure that hasn't always been the case, but you know, again, not perfect. Okay. But in the end, we need to be true to ourselves in business. And the prerequisite to that is knowing who we really are and assessing, is this truly who we want to be, right? Because as we decide who we want to be, we're going to get that reflected back to us by other people.
54:51 generally speaking. So if we decide that we do want to be someone who's very aggressive, who puts it in people's faces, then when we receive that, we shouldn't be surprised. And if we don't like it, well, that's kind of tough for us because we're getting as good as we're we're we're getting as good as we're giving. And that's largely how life works, especially in business. Okay. So, um real quickly again just repeating um the list here that I'm working with um from from John from John
55:26 Wooden's wisdom as I called it. Wooden's wisdom, right? He talks about the pyramid of success. Those those character traits and behaviors that are success that are essential for achievement. Focus on process, not just outcomes. Make each day your masterpiece. Control the controllables. Little things make big things happen. And finally, be true to yourself. So if if we can follow Wooden's wisdom, um especially as he writes here in this book, I think not only will we be more successful, I think we'll be happier as
56:02 well. Or maybe maybe not happier, but we'll be more content. And people who have a sense of contentedness about them generally attract other people to them. And that's good for business as well. So again, I I encourage you to uh read Wooden and absorb more of Wooden's wisdom and and go on to ever greater success, not just in your business and professional lives, but in in in your overall lives. So I thank you very much for joining me today, especially those of you who are watching live. Always a
56:39 treat to know you're there. And this is our my last show for this week. So, next week, uh, on Monday at 10:00 a.m. Pacific time is my show, Trust and Estates Weekly. I found out yesterday my my guest has a conflict. She's not going to be able to make it. We'll see if we can reschedu Tiffany for another time. Um, but we'll we'll be there uh we'll be there at 10 a.m. on Monday talking about matters relating to trust and estates. On Tuesday at 10 a.m. is my show, Business Lessons from the Military. A week from today, we'll be back for the
57:15 next edition of People Making Money. And then next week on Thursday at 5:00 PM Pacific time is my every other week show, Jiggers's Place, where we sit back, it's getting toward the end of the week, we have a cocktail, and we talk about all the things that have nothing to do with our professional lives. So, I hope you'll join me several times uh next week. I look forward to uh seeing you at least metaphorically and uh wishing you a wonderful rest of the day and week and signing off as I always do. Marie darling, you are my bell. Courage
57:52 at all times, my friends.